Merry Christmas!

Mum said that the humans are too busy hosting Christmas for both sides of the family to do a proper post. Hmph! At least she's letting us open our own presents! Rip, rip, shred, ahhhh, it's a good day to be Destructo Dogs! Merry Christmas to all!

Suspicious Santa

Mum and Dad have been running around stuffing things into bags and checking lists twice. We think maybe they are Santa. Then they mentioned stuffing US into Dad's sleigh station wagon (which is red, btw, mmm hmm, it's all making sense) at a very early hour of the morning and going on a long trip. What do we get out of being Santa's Fluffy Elves? We're keeping an eye on you, Santa Paws! We know your secret identity, and we had BETTER be on the woofing nice list, or we will reveal all!

 

Jack and Ella supervising Santa's shenanigans.

Stay tuned for our next update on Christmas Eve! We'll give you all the goss on Rudolph, and whether he is really just a Great Dane with a bit of a cold and those fake antlers that are all the rage.

P.S. Jack here. Mum tried to put the antlers on me, but I thought they were a stuffy toy Santa's Reporting Antenna and tried to destroy them, mwahaha, in case he put me on the naughty list for no good reason. BOL.

No Dogs

Mt Gravatt has beautiful (steep!) walking tracks through the bush, so we like to take the humans up there for some exercise. We thought it might be nice to work up a good appetite and then have breakfast at the Echidna Magic Cafe. However, this sign greeted us:

WTD?!! Discrimination! Dogs are allowed on the tracks (on leash), but then we can't relax and enjoy the views. The humans had breakfast there on a day that they dared to go out without us (grr), but said it was very overpriced and the food wasn't very nice. Hah! That'll teach them.

Mad Monday

Edit: Mum says she doesn't know why the pics looked as if they'd been taken through a fly screen earlier. She uploaded them via Blogger Android thingy, which usually works fine. Not good enough, MUM. We must be seen in all our mighty rampaging glory!

Swimming at Sandgate

Sandgate Beach - This is an awfully big bath, Mum!

Jack here, reporting in from my snuggle blankie. It's been an absolutely beautiful weekend here in sunny Brisbane, so the humans decided to take us on an adventure. Dad put the horrible harnesses on us, and put us in the magic machine (or 'car' as the Mum calls it) and we set off to Sandgate. And we enjoyed ourselves so much yesterday, that we did the same thing today! Yeah! Ella is passed out on the lounge snoring. Dad is passed out in his chair snoring. And I'm getting Mum to type this quickly so that we can join in the snorefest.

Living the good life on our own private island!

I'm completely knackered after going for a proper swim for the very first time. Usually I paddle and then reverse out of the wet stuff as quickly as my paws can take me. But this weekend Mum and Dad were walking with me, and I was bouncing through the water happily when Mum started making the most awful squealing noise! She was saying, "Jackie's swiiiiiiiimiiiiiiing, look babe, he's swimming!"

What? OH NOES, WHERE DID THE GROUND GO?!!! And why is Mum's voice so squeaky?!

Jellyfish - "LEAVE IT" command? Love it!

Anywoof, it was pawsomely fun. Except when the nasty waves kept slapping me in the face and the humans sounded suspiciously like they might have been snickering about it, and offered such useful advice as, "Turn your face away, mate!" Oh Really? If you weren't making me swim towards you into the slap-happy waves that might have been a bit easier, HUMANS!

They also yelled "Leave it!" a fair bit,  but we didn't mind for once because there were scary looking things like this jellyfish! Dad says that this sort isn't dangerous like a lot of the other ones (Ella: I was not told that there are a LOT of other bad stingy sorts! I'm rethinking this beach business.)

Dad also saw a stone fish and even yelled at Mum to stay away from that one. They are very poisonous and can even kill you if the sting is untreated. (Ella: What? .... I'm never leaving the lounge again.)

 

Sandgate Beach - Dogs Gone Wild

We had an absolute ball but all that running and swimming has made me super sleepy so I'm going to tell Mum to put the lappytop and me to bed.  I hope all your dreams are as good as mine will be tonight.

Porky Pups

Ella says:

So, the nasty vet pinched me and told me I'm fat. Is that any way to talk to a lady?! He called me a Porky Pup. So hurtful. He wants me to lose at least 1kg, preferably 2, and said that Jack could stand to lose around 1kg.

Doesn't he realise how much work is involved to get extra kgs? The sad faces I've had to pull? The bins I've had to raid? The pet shop girls I've had to schmooze for treats? The Daddy I've had to... well, he pretty much gives me treats if I breathe, so not really too much effort there, heh heh heh. And of course, Mum, instead of defending me and pointing out that I'm just a bit fluffy at the moment, AGREED WITH HIM. Foul treachery! Check out my physique to the left. I'm strong and confident in my Big Beautiful Woofer fur.

This is what's going to happen to the vet next time he says something rude to us ===>

The upside is we're getting even more exercise and good foods in an effort to slim down. Dad (and Mum if she's not on late shift) have started taking us for a walk at 4:45am because it's getting super hot in Brisbane now and that's the only time cool enough to be enjoyable. For our overseas visitors, Brisbane is a sub-tropical city and we're headed into Summer. It was 36 degrees Celsius (97F) at our house yesterday! Even worse, it's so muggy that it feels like the air is a heavy wet blanket trying to smother us. Bleh!

Anywoof, Mum said that we're looking more streamlined already, and that we'll all feel better for being fitter. Oh really? I don't see HER evening rations being halved, do I?! Growl.

Dental Dilemma and Review: VetzLife Oral Care Gel (Part 1)

Jack here. We had to visit the vet the other day, and after rudely shoving his fingers into our mouths and other areas they don't belong, he made two nasty comments. I'll deal with the first one, and Ella will growl about the second one later.

Jack's worst tooth.

 First of all, he declared that our upper chompers need some extra help staying clean. Mum was a bit miffed as we're fed raw bones, piggy ears, and we have kongs and other fun things to chew on. The vet told her that all of that is excellent and would usually keep our teeth pearly white, but he suspects that our mouth structure and breed is working against us ever out-smiling Julia Roberts.

Ella's grotty incisors/canine.

He made some horrible suggestions to try over the next 6 months, otherwise he's going to "put them under" for a "good scrub and scale". Put who under what?! Scrub is something we run through at the family farm, and scales belong on the dead fishies I like to roll in, don't they? I'm so confused. Ella had her head buried in Mum's armpit by that point (she's such a lady), so she thinks I'm making it up. But I know what I heard!

Mum is too lazy to try for a less reflective photo.

VetzLife Oral Care Gel in Original Peppermint is the first suggestion to clean up our chompers. So Mum bought some like the annoying goody-two-shoes that she is. From their website: "VetzLife produces 100% All-Natural Oral Care products, including Spray & Gels, which help remove plaque and tartar, reverse oral disease, promote healthy gums, brighten teeth and helps control bacteria that causes bad breath. The secret is a proprietary blend of grapefruit seed extract and other all-natural herbs and ingredients."

We don't particularly like the taste (Mum note: I would have bought the salmon flavour, but they'd sold out). I've mastered the art of sucking my jowls in and clamping my jaw shut, mwahaha, so at least I'm going down with a fight! Since we have weirdo reactions to a lot of common medicines, we're only getting half the usual dose to make sure it's ok for us for the first few days. So far so good. Mum is going to take some follow-ups photos to check on the progress.

She's also supposed to start brushing our teeth. See above re: jowl sucking and jaw clamping and start laying your bets on this happening successfully. On the upside, we're also to continue getting our raw bones etc, and Mum also bought us some deer antlers, which are supposed to be good for toothie cleaning.

I'll keep you updated on our dental dilemma.

Snuggles
Jack

Wordless Wednesday - Kedron Brook

Paws for Diabetics

When we first came home as little puppies, Mum was newly diagnosed with diabetes and struggling to get it under control. When the sugar monster gets angry she can get really sick very quickly, and the humans were worried and trying to figure out the best ways of helping her. Our neighbour told Dad that Chinese Crested are particularly known for being excellent and often natural Diabetic Alert Dogs, so even though the humans were a bit sceptical they started doing some research and Dad started tracking our behaviour.

He noticed that I (Ella) would nibble at Mum's fingers and paw at her face sometimes. Jack would sit on Mum's chest and make little whimpering noises and nudge her mouth with his nose. If Mum didn't pay attention to us, we'd run and harass Dad until he followed us back to her. Clever Dad started stabbing Mum's finger (she says he takes far too much pleasure in this!) to check what the sugar monster was doing whenever we did these out-of-character things, and he realised that her Blood Glucose Levels were out of range every time! He started calling us her little Nanny Dogs, because we're so good at bossing her around and making sure that she's ok, often before she even starts to feel the sugar monster roaring around!


Mum said that we were her clever little muppets, and she and Dad started to make a big fuss and give us nom noms whenever we alerted to the sugar monster misbehaving. Now we put our paws on Mum's shoulders periodically and demand that she breathe at us so we can check her breath for any nasty messages the sugar monster is sending. If it's behaving we give a satisfied little snort (let's face it, her breath isn't always peppermint fresh) and go on our way, but if not we tell her by smacking her in the face with our paws or nose! The sugar monster can make humans sleepy and their thinking a bit clouded, so we give her one more chance and bite her hand a few times (no, we don't leave teeth marks, but I will increase the pressure until she responds, Jack just gets progressively more hysterical), if she STILL ignores us we dibber dobber to Dad or whoever else is around.

Mum and Dad tell us that they lucked out in the extreme finding us, since we didn't even need to be trained to alert. In fact, before they figured out what was going on Mum used to tell us to stop annoying her, the nerve! For the people with diabetes who haven't cosmically acquired two pawesome sniffers like us,  there's a wonderful program in Australia called Paws for Diabetics Inc. They are a non-profit that trains Diabetic Alert Dogs, and Mum and Dad think they are totally awesome! Check out some of the lives they've helped to save and/or improve if you get a chance.

Helping Mum head in the right direction - forward!

Smooches and Wags
Ella (with Jack 'helping' over my shoulder)

Tricky Treats

I am not a thief! I mean, look at me with Daddy, butter wouldn't melt in my mouth, right?!

Mum is accusing me of climbing the lounge and side table to get the pack of treats below. She didn't see me, so I'm not admitting to anything. Those teeth marks are probably part of the marketing campaign. The nearly empty packet? Well, everyone knows those tricksy companies mostly fill the bag with air. And the piece that she pulled out of my bed was probably planted by Jack. The bit in my mouth I was just helpfully disposing of so she didn't have to tidy up. In summary, Mum's case against me is entirely circumstantial. Owwwwwww, gotta run, the belly is gurgling again.

Smoochies
Ella

Wordless Wednesday - Wet

Cutie Booties or Froggy Legs

Hmm, blogger is playing silly buggers. I will instruct Mum to put up a post tonight if we she doesn't fall asleep in her armchair like a little old nanna.

Smoochies
Ella

Prepared

Jack here. Ready to report on all the latest news for Crested Chorus. Don't you think this photo is perfect for my byline?

Ella says:  Where's the cute photos of me, Jack? You like sharing the limelight about as much as you like sharing your piggy ear! I'm gonna tell Mum that you're hogging the blog!

Bored

Jack here. I'm uploading a picture so that there is evidence of the ongoing neglect of innocent dogs that is going on in this household. The humans continue to pat the stupid phone things instead of us.

It's friggin Sunday! We go on adventures on the weekend, yet it's almost midday and here we sit. Bored. Sigh.

Just because they took us to a bakery and two new off-leash parks yesterday they think they can slack off. And I don't care if Dad played a gig last night so they didn't get to bed until 3am! That just means that he should be sucking up to me even more for leaving me.

Patting the wrong toy

Mum and Dad have new toys that they keep patting instead of us. This is just not on! All their pats belong to us! They keep carrying on about 'androids' and 'smartphones' and how 'tech' is making their lives easier. If we meet any of these characters we're going to bite them, grr.

In fact, we may be forced to live up to the name of this blog and start the famous (infamous?) Crested Chorus up.

P.S. Mum said that would be awesome cos she could record us for the blog! Hmph!